Hard Choices

From the moment we exit our mother’s womb, we are not safe.

My wife and I gave the second season of HBO’s The Leftovers another chance after a disappointing first season, and we’ve been surprisingly impressed. But it was the season’s first 10 minutes that still hit me the hardest, particularly the scene of a rattlesnake slithering over a defenseless baby while the mother looked for food.

It is actually a phenomenal metaphor to describe the world we live in today. Dangers are everywhere, no matter how natural or artificial.

One week ago today, Paris was attacked. The attacks were horrific to me personally, because the terrorists decided to target a music venue. People go to theatres, arenas, clubs, and other such places to leave the sheer craziness of the outside world behind them and come into a sanctuary with their friends and family to enjoy the universal language that is music.

These terrorists sought to vanquish that sanctuary (which they called perverted, a world of “prostitution and vice”). They sought to bring the craziness of the outside world into this place. To replace the positive energy with a deep fear of the person next to you. To put you on guard at all times no matter what, even if it means missing out on the electricity, the energy and the fun that the music on stage is suppose to provide.

I bring this up because the other day a Lingo fan mentioned that from now on whenever he was going to a theater, he would be carrying his gun. While this may be a gradually more popular position, especially in the state of Georgia, this fan’s declaration was enough for me to no longer be silent about these issues that really matter to me, even if it meant I would lose him and other fans along the way.

While others in his thread agreed with his decision, I did not. While saying it was his choice, I informed him that if he insisted on arming himself that way, it was also my choice to ask him not to come to any more of my shows.

Basically, if you are not a hired employee – be it of the venue, the band or anyone else involved with the production of the show – and you intend to come with a concealed or open-carried gun, please do not come.

You may say it’s for your protection and everyone else there, but you will unwittingly bring a vibe and energy that runs counter to everything I believe live music and entertainment is supposed to be about.

As he explained his case, this fan asked wouldn’t I want him there, for my safety and the safety of my band mates, fans, and family? That’s exactly why I don’t want fans who are open-carry or concealed-carry at my shows, no matter how responsible they may claim or prove to be.

That is why we have hired security at shows. That’s why we have, for better or worse, the police. Trained professionals who are hired to do a dangerous job. As a fan, your job is to enjoy the show along with everyone else there and, most importantly, do no harm. Let the ones hired to protect do the protecting. If you don’t trust them to do their job, then you shouldn’t be there in the first place.

Some also say that the world has changed, and we must change with it. It’s no longer safe to go to a ball game or a concert anymore they exclaim, so even if it means the person next to them is uncomfortable with it, they must protect themselves wherever they go.

They may feel comforted by their loaded pistol, but that still masks a deep rooted fear of the people around them. How is one entertained by such anxiety and suspicion? Not only that, how does it make everyone else around them feel? Does it make them want to be there more, or less? Quite frankly, if I have to accept a world where every fan at every music venue is carrying a gun, I would rather retire from live music, and make my music in my studio (now that I think about it, if society heads down that road, I sincerely doubt that music will play any good part in it, pun intended).

On a similar note, while I was writing this post my wife asked me if everybody in a venue did have a gun, how would you tell apart the good guy with a gun from the bad guy? How many times have the media talked to the mother, father, spouse or close friend of a shooter who did a mass shooting, and they said they had no idea this person was capable of such an act?  That he/she was a good person.  A good guy. With a gun.

The truth is that nobody packing heat believes they are a bad guy with a gun. It’s only when a violent situation arises do we as a society then judge after the fact that this good guy with a gun was actually a bad guy.

I may not always agree with Bob Lefsetz, but I love and read his work any time I can, and he wrote something the other day that is really poignant:

Today the people on the other end [of the world] can instill fear in your heart and change your way of life. If you let them. Sure, you’re scared. Who wouldn’t be. But when you sacrifice your privacy and lifestyle to create a false sense of security you’re the loser.

But if you feel safer carrying a gun with you at all times, that’s fine. Everyone has a right under the law to decide how to conduct their lives, and feel protected. But the fans I want to share my music with are those who don’t feel the need to be armed everywhere they go, especially at music venues. For me, trying to differentiate between a good guy and a bad guy with a gun is just too costly on my brain, my soul and my time. I would rather just make music for other people to enjoy, hire someone for the show to be the good guy with the gun, and have them treat any other non-employed, packing patron as the bad guy with a gun.

If you find that insulting, so be it. If that means there are some clubs that I cannot play anymore, so be it. My intention will be to protect myself and everyone at my shows the best I can, while simultaneously not sacrificing the principles I have as a musician and artist.

God forbid any violence that would come to my family, friends, band mates and fans, but we live in a world that is not ever 100% safe, and no amount of weaponry we carry will change that. We can and should always be cautious and observant of our surroundings.  But I believe the terrorists responsible for that horrible night in Paris would love to see someone like me choose the easy path and change who I am, what I am, and how I conduct and live my life because of what they did.  I would rather take the hard path of staying true to myself and not live in fear.  I hope you do too.